Well, he never got too lonely And he never got too sad But he never got too happy And that's what's just too bad He never reached much further Than his lonely arms would go He wore a seatbelt around his heart And they called him Safety Joe Safety Joe, Safety Joe (Safety Joe, Safety Joe) What do you say? What do you know? If you don't loosen up the buckle On your heart and start to chuckle You're gonna die of boredom, Safety Joe Now, Joe he lived in Baltimore 'Cause New York was too darn fast He sometimes went down to Washington Just to view our nation's past He never ate his vegetables 'Cause they were just too darn chewy And he never climbed much higher Than the arch in old St. Louis Safety Joe, Safety Joe (Safety Joe, Safety Joe) What do you say? What do you know? If you don't loosen up the buckle On your heart and start to chuckle Well, you're gonna die of boredom, Safety Joe Where's that mandolin? It's the chorus Joe gradually grew meaner By not changin' his demeanor But he never did nothin' Too much for too long Therefore his life never got much richer Than the day they took that picture In his birthday suit On the day that he was born Safety Joe, Safety Joe (Safety Joe, Safety Joe) What do you say? What do you know? If you don't loosen up the buckle On your heart and start to chuckle Well, you're gonna die of boredom, Safety Joe Well, you're gonna die of boredom, Safety Joe That's golden