I'm a dog shaped ashtray I'm a shrugging moustache wearing a speedo tuxedo I'm a movie with no plot, written in the back seat of a piss powered taxi I'm an imperial armpit, sweating Chianti I'm a toilet with no seat, flushing tradition down I'm socialist lingerie I'm diplomatic techno I'm gay pastry and racist cappuccino I'm an army on holiday in a guillotine museum I'm a painting made of hair, on a nudist beach, eating McDonald's I'm a novel far too long I'm a sentimental song I'm a yellow tooth waltzing with wrap around shades on Who am I? I am Europe